The only thing you need to succeed in life

The successful warrior is the average man, with laser-like focus.
Bruce Lee

Be like him…

Do you control life, or life controls you?

If you are focused on what you do you control your life.
Otherwise life controls you.

To be really focused is one of the most difficult achievement in life.

That’s  why so many people fail to get what they want.

You and me are the people….you know what I am talking about.

To be focused it’s a habit that requires a lot of commitment, time and…well…focus.

So, why it is so difficult to be focused even thought we recognize its importance?

First of all not many people are aware of the power of focus.

It’s part of the human nature to lose focus, to get distracted.

Usually the most we like the task the most we can keep our focus; but most of the times we still need to be concentrated.

Make this exercise, whatever you are doing (a report, writing, eating) try to focus only on that activity for 20-30minutes.

Difficult, isn’t it?

How many times we started writing that email or report and by the end of day it is not  completed yet?

So the tasks cumulated, we stay in the office until 800pm and we have the impression that nothing got done.

Well… actually because you really got nothing done, because you wasted your day losing the focus, switching to another activity, losing again the focus and switching again.

Think about it, the huge amount of time you waste during the switching.
Be real, you cannot spend one day just answering some emails and writing 1 page of report.

Typically because after 5 minutes you are working on the report you jump to another email, conf call, browsing the news and check out the latest news about Ronaldo Girlfriend…

Ok…I let you now to lose the focus for 14 minutes and watch the below video…you will find yourself there…

Back?

Good…

Focus gives direction to your life

Focus is essential to get the things completed and in the right way.

Focus is essential to put the right attention on what you are doing.

Without focus our life is jumping from one task to another, without direction.

And without directions you cannot go nowhere and get anything done.

To achieve things and create value you need focus. If you want to play an instruments or read an essay you need to allocate time for it and just being focus on it.

Don’t think that if you don’t get the right focus on something it necessary means you don’t like it.
(Generally because when you like something time flies doing it).

I love running and writing but I still need to be very disciplined to allocate the time for these activities.

I love running but I can tell you that most of the time I would rather stay in the bed than hitting the road at 5.30am in a rainy day.


But once in the run…it’s fantastic, the focus and the pleasure it’s there.
The same for writing and in general for everything I love.

Again, don’t be deceived about identifying your passions in watching TV, playing games or surfing the web because when you are doing it “time flies” and you are very focused.

When you watch TV, play games or browse the web time flies because your brain is off as a result of the very addictive nature of those things.  

Don’t be fooled…trillions of dollars are spend on  designing video games, social networks and  everything else on screens highly addictive  to increase our screen time.

Those things are highly addictive like alcohol, drugs and tobacco.

Just look around you people literally glued on their phone if you don’t believe me…

Practice focus

The new you
The new you

Practice focus: start small, on the daily activities: when you eat don’t watch TV or be on the phone, just eat; when you start an email just don’t do anything else until completion.
Let the phone ring (unless it is a very important customer or a real emergency) and check the voice message later.

Commit 10 min of focus on one activity and gradually increase to 15-20-30 minutes.
The goal here is to allocate a timeframe for an activity and complete it in the decided timeframe.

Thirty minutes for a report, 30 minutes for emails , 1 hour exercising etc. with no interruption.

By the end of the day the results will be astonishing: the important report completed, the inbox clean and your workout done.

Be beamed focus in everything you do; you will reach your goals and the world will be yours!

That’s my promise.

How to stop Complaining for good in 9 days

Poor you….!

“The pessimist complains about the wind. The optimist expects it to change. The leader adjusts the sails.” – John Maxwell

Make a favor to yourself: stop complaining,

Right now and forever.

You cannot?

Ok so keep reading…

Complaining is the worst thing you can do to yourself.

If you spend most of your time complaining of something it means you need to change that something.

As simple as that, otherwise you are going nowhere.

Complaining is not changing a situation, it just aggravates it. This because  you are putting focus on a negative situation  and what you put focus on it expands.

As human beings we need to find solutions to problems, not problems to situations.

Finding the problem is easy, it’s the 5% of the job.

Everyone can step in a situation and find dozens of problem in it.

The  value is to bring solutions to problems.

Complaining you are fat will not make you lose weight.

Eating less and moving more will.

Losers find problems to solutions and complain.

Winners find solutions to problems and prosper.

It is up to you to decide on which side you are.

Why people complains?

Most of the people seem stuck in their lives, jobs, marriage, situations, etc. and they complain all the time.

Why ?

I came up with four main reasons:

  1. Family
  2. Fear of Change
  3. Sense of unworthiness
  4. Because it’s the Easy way

Family

Some people prefer compromising (e.g. a job or partner with few/no satisfactions) rather than disappointing family members.
In some case the compromise can be acceptable (for example not taking a job abroad to stay close to family members).

But, most of the time it’s an excuse!

They use the Family card to complain and justify the reason why they don’t make enough money or why they are not courageous enough to bring some changes in their lives to live in their Dream location doing what they love.

Fear of change

Fear is the number one obstacle that prevents people from growing.

Think about it : almost every personal improvement goes through some degree of fear (learning how to swim, sky, or to change for a better job/place).

If you don’t win your fears you will not grow and stay in your Comfort (or fear) Zone.

But why do we fear so much and what?

Basically for two main reasons: not leaving a comfort situation  and for reason number three:  sense of unworthiness.

Sense of Unworthiness

Often we resist change because we don’t think we are able to achieve things in life (“to be unworthy”).

“I can’t ever do that job!”

“I cannot learn how to sky!”

“Only big bosses can get a VP position”

…you know what I mean.

So instead of trying the take big leap we decide to stay in our condition certain that  this is the maximum we can achieve in life.
This behavior comes from of our society that inculcates a strong sense of modesty and negativity.

Having spend my life in different Countries and Continents I was able to experience the strong influence of the society on its people.
Usually the development of a Country depends upon to the degree of positivity and hope of the society.

Many people just don’t grow because they are negative, they don’t believe in themselves because they were thought in that way .
They spend their time complaining and their society is characterized by conflicts.
Conversely, where union and positive attitude are predominant, people are growing, intellectually and economically.

Complaining is easy

Again but why it looks like everyone around us is complaining?
Well, because people are (for some reason) negative and moreover because complaining is easy.

Yes, complaining is the easiest thing in the world.

Think about it, complaining can justify your failures in every  situation, job, relationship… in everything.

So, is it easier to wake up and improve the situation (or simply accept it) or just complaining? Complaining it’s your boss, partner, friend, family, the weather, the economy, , etc. fault?
This is exactly why people spend their time complaining. It easy and justify our failures.

That’s why you are going to easily see people complaining about their boss while they take their thirty coffee break instead on working on improving the quality of their job.

If you don’t like a situation work to change it.
Don’t stop until it change.
And it usually works if you are really focus and convinced to change it.
When you don’t like a job or boss simply change it, it easier than you think. You of course will go through a slight disconformable period due to the changing process (disrupting your Comfort Zone) but you will find a solution to a problem.

I know many people are thinking now “You picture it too easy; it’s impossible to find another job”.

I can tell you it easier than you think; I made it several time through my life and now I am happy.

But you really need to face the situation and win the fear of change.
There are billions of jobs, partners, places and situations out there.
Better than what you are experiencing now.

Don’t just sit and complain about your situation stating it’s impossible to change and trying to show the world it’s not your fault for the failure.

We are the only one responsible for our success and failures.

For sure some external factors can influence some situations but only marginally and very temporary.

All the decisions we made are up of us; our jobs, partners, friends, health and wealth.

Everything.

How to stop Complaining for good in 9 days

Make this exercise, I promise you it will be very illuminating.

Stop complaining for 9 days.

Only 9days.

Not only externally but also internally, mentally.

Whenever you feel like complaining just stop, think about something else, tell yourself you will complain later, at the end of the 10 days.

I promise you: after the 10 days you will see the whole world from a different angle and start understanding the negative power of complaining.

And the great power you have inside of you, if you just want to use it.

Again, make a favor to yourself and the whole world stop complaining and aim for the excellence.

We need you.

Why the Writer Block simply does not exist

Sometimes it’s hard…

Writing can be difficult.

Or the easiest thing,

Writer block right?

Block of what?

Of the hand?
Or of the brain?

Why the Writer Block simply does not exist.

I don’t have blocks on what I love, you should have not either.

I can, right now write for hours, days, months.
Maybe not like Hemingway but like me, talking about what I love.

If I have to write about what I love, this comes natural, fluent, because I have tons of things to say..and I want to see all of them.

That’s why the Writer Block simply does not exist.

If you are blocked is because you have nothing to say, you are not interested in the topic.

If you love playing tennis, you will play it. If you are not playing it right now is simply because you don’t like it, not because you don’t have time or your body cannot.

Same for the writing (or speaking)

We should write because we have something to say, not something to fake, to build up to meet our audience, because we need readers.

We do need readers because we do want to be read but, first and foremost, we do need to have a message to convey, to share, to debate.
A message that ignites something in your readers, that makes them think, wish to be better, or simply create a small revolution inside their soul.

Money

I know I know…already seen…but I love this pic

We discussed about it.

How to save them, to invest them…to reach financial independence (if this is what you want)

Then what?
Retire from you bad and evil  boss…uh uh poor you…

And what you are going to do with all that saved time ?

Retiring to do what?

Listen, if money is the only thing you are  looking  for and blogging is what you think is the solution you should stop write now writing and reading the tons of blogs bragging they make hundreds of thousands of dollars per month.

Yes you can make money blogging.

But

  • You must have some good message to convey (otherwise why  should I read you
  • You must have some fundamental on how to market you blog
  • You must have sincere interest on other similar blog and interact with them
  • You must put the work…real work

Or

You can get a job to flip burgers and be sure you can make more $$$-hour.

Excluding some exception of very first comers (but with very strong valuable messages like Steve , very hard workers (100+h/week like Michelle) , mediocre blogs who were able to get visibility on top 10 blogs worldwide (too many unfortunately)  not many bloggers make tons of money.

Just relax

Just write what you really believe in.
What you would like to talk for hours, days…
What you would like others to  listen.

From suggestion on investing  in mutual fund, to how to build a giant castle made of Play Doh.

It doesn’t matter the topic.

As long you write about what you love and convey a valuable message.

Enlighten other people with your gifts. your achievements, your energy.

Open their eyes like many other blogs, books, magazines, websites, people opened yours and mine and changed us forever.

No, you cannot have NOTHING to say.

You are much better than that.

SOTB 2019 (State of the Blog 2019….what else?)

Provided we are in SOTU period here it is my SOTB.

POSTS

19 Posts
15 in 2018 (from end of april when Freedom was born)
4 in 2019

I know I know…too few…
I need to be disciplined here…2019 target is to publish every Saturday and dropping here an there some additional posts.

STATISTICS

Last 30 days:
2334 Visitors
4220 Visits

Mostly from the USA, Germany, Holland, France and China.

TOP BLOG POSTS

  1. The Blogger Dilemma: The Difficult Art to Exist (on the Internet)
  2. Why this BLOG? To (Easily) Conquer the 5 Goals of Your LIFE
  3. Where do YOU want to live? Living in the BEST place in the World (Hint: it’s not the U.S.A.)

COMMENTS
Not very active but I am not very surprised since:
1) Traffic is still too limited
2) Most of My blog posts doesn’t really leave a lot of room to comments, questions
3) I think people prefer to comment on twitter, facebook etc instead of directly on the blog

I am not surprised the Blogger Dilemma reached the top spot since with the proliferation of the blogs more and more people are somehow disappointed and disillusioned from the lower than expected traffic in their blogs.
The post brings back on the basics: i.e. creating value.
The post in second place very likely had several visitors trying to understand what the blog was about.
I have to say I was not surprised of the post in third position since most of my readers seems attracted by topics such retirement, where to live and they are from the U.S.A.

MONETIZING

As of today my blog is entirely ads or affiliate links free meaning that my annual revenues in 2018 were (drum rolls please …$0$)
As I wrote in the past: Filling my website pages with Random computer generated Google Ads suggesting you some Shrimp Antonia Bag Pink Size One it is simply not for me.
In 2019 I will start some experiments suggesting you to use great tools like Personal Capital to keep tracking your finances is something I really believe into it like in other products I do really use and enjoy on a regular basis.
Keep you updated!

SOCIAL NETWORKS


In late November I started the Twitter account linked to this blog and I am having a blast to read all the interesting comments and post of my fellow bloggers out there.
In few weeks I was able to reach over 100 followers (20% in my opinion are only real followers).
I also opened a Facebook account linked to this blog but I do really think blog + Twitter is enough so far as main communication channel.

WHAT IN 2019

1) Publish every Saturday no matter what
2) Start some experiments in monetizing the blog
3) Extend to other social channel (e.g. Instagram, Reddit, Pinterest)
4) Being published by some media
5) Reach 10K Visitors/mo 20K Visits/mo

While always (trying to) create some value for you.

Talk to you at SOTB 2020!

The most dangerous place to be: The Comfort Zone

I found that people are trapped in their habits (often bad) due to the most two dangerous status in the world…

They are comfortable.

Ironically comfortably enough is the main goal for many people.
A roof on the head, enough food in the refrigerator, a nice tv, car and sofa.

What do you want more then right?

Well if you are one of my fellow readers you want more right? (otherwise you would be (again) comfortably browsing the tv on your couch instead of browsing blogs on personal development).

Let me state it straight….most people love to be comfortable…9 to 5 until 65 and ending their life in a nursery home…and I am happy for them.

But we are not one of them, we want to live our life differently…on the edge. Experiencing different things…suffering now  to move to another dimension later…to get  financial independence to be more free.

That’s where the excitement start.

Living in a Comfort Zone.

Life is made of different comfort zones.
We go through them all our life.
When we reach a comfort zone it’s… well “comfortable”; the things around us are familiar, we know how things works, we have no fear.

When we stably reached a comfort zone and we are (again X2) too comfortable it’s sign we need to move to another one and not just adopt small changes in our lives (like Forbes suggests).

Because if you are too comfortable you are not growing.

Moving to the next comfort zone and growing is often painful…so we try to escape changes as adult.

A baby at some point will need to start walking.
He will fall and hurt himself (the pain) but the price is worth it…he will walk (the growth) because the curiosity is much bigger than the pain.

The same when we leave elementary school to middle school, the separation is painful, the environment is new but again we are growing!

And interesting enough in most of the cases (if not the totality) nobody regrets the change.

But later in life changing becomes more and more difficult because changes can be more drastic, not necessary needed  and without a  safety net.

Or very simply because as adults, we are more scared.

Typical examples are changing your job or leaving your home town; for someone it just seems impossible.
Leaving a secure job for starting a business, or the simple act of stop smoking.

When we decide not to change it’s in that precise moment that we stop growing, we stop speaking about the future; we speak only in present and past tense.

And we convince ourselves that we cannot do otherwise; “I would like doing that but…
The “Yeah but…” ; finding excuses to remain in the actual state.

How many times we had told ourselves: “I would do it but“:

I am too old
I am too young
I am too poor
I am too sick
My parents are too old or sick
My wife has a good job
My kids go to school and cannot change
I don’t have time
etc.
etc.

Men need to grow, always, otherwise they must be dying.

The Turning Point

What trigger a change ; what is the revelation, the “Ah moment“, the turning point?

In every instant of our life we are the sum of all the experiences accumulated since we were born.
We think differently of what we were used to 10 years ago and will think in 10 year.
What we can understand now was unconceivable 10 years ago and in 10 years from now we will have a different understanding.

Someone call it wisdom.

I call it the turning point.

In my life different events triggered deep changes in my life and prospective; start living abroad, losing a parent, leaving difficult situations and people behind are some turning points of my life.
I start loving me more , taking more care about my self, saving money, believing I deserve more that I thought.

Hadn’t I never took critical steps (e.g. leaving  certain situations or habits) my life would surely be on a different path, for sure worst.
It took courage to leave the comfort zone and luckily some events happened so fast and so concentrated to accelerate the processes.
But again I took the first step.

In our life we always know when it’s time to change; if we don’t it’s because we lie to ourselves (the “Yeah…but…“) or we created a thick layer around our micro world that make us blind.

I firmly believe our life should be on a path of continuous improvement; the changes can be small, microscopic (there is no need to leave your job or hometown if this is really what you love to do) but they must be there.

But then, why so many people are not happy around us? Why they complain about their job, misfortune, money, everything else?

Because they stop growing and being negative is the easiest path of accepting (or justifying ) their situation.

Every time someone complains with me about how unhappy is in a “changeable” situation (marriage, job, hometown) I candidly ask “Why don’t you change?” (and usually the answer is “Yeah…but“)

Every time someone asks me how I am doing my typically answer is “Great!” and I strongly mean it. Of course someday I am tired, sick and in a not perfect mood but it’s what inside of me that makes me feel great.

The feeling great comes from the love and passion to move ahead, to the next step.

I am falling and failing  all the time and I will fall  and fail some more.

Maybe I will not reach all my goals but some for sure and this is all that really matters to me.

Never Forget:

We become what we think about, all day long”  (Ralph Waldo Emerson).

How much life do you really live?

Is it blurred. Isn’t it?

How much life do you really live and how much do you waste?

Yes of course you are busy.

You are the busiest in the world right?

Think again

The biggest reason why you have the sensation not to have time is only because you  (waste) too much time on screens doing NOTHING

You don’t believe me right?

Look at this video:

Only in the USA people spend almost 11 hours per day in front of screen…

The effects are devastating:

1.      We achieve nothing in our life 

Doing something  with all free time wasted in front of a screen it’s practically impossible.

(Setting your goals (Oh no…there I go again!!!))

  2.      Health 

Screen time has huge negative effects on your health like:

  • Weight gain (unsurprisingly!)
  • Hearth disease
  • Diabetes
  • Sleep quality and quantity
  • Posture related diseases to shoulder, neck, back
  • Cancer (sitting is the new smoking…I am sure you already heard this)
  • Vision: blurred vision, vision loss, dry eyes

3.       Devastating negative impact on Kids

It’s imperative to limit the screen time to children who are several times more vulnerable to the devastating effect of screen time on the brain and on the body.

Just think that:

Three-quarters of UK children spend less time outside than prison inmates

Kids are practically not playing outside anymore.

Just ask any sport shop selling tennis rackets or soccer equipment.

Kids are playing sports but in video games…that’s it.

According to a recent study, 92 percent of babies had used a mobile device before their first birthday. Nearly 35 percent have their own mobile device at age 2 and that number is 75 percent among 4-year-olds

Especially for preteen and teenagers the  brain goes through major changes and the impacts of the screen is devastating on attention disorders (if you have a kid you can experience it everyday), emotions and personality, creativity, self-confidence, learning and social skills and sports.

In 2010, researchers found that kids who logged more than two hours a day in front of a computer or TV screens had a higher chance of psychological difficulties on a standard questionnaire.

 4.   Highly addictive

Do you notice how addict you are on checking continuously your phone, email, wearable etc.?

It’s call addiction.

Every  year trillions of dollars are invested in R&D of screen makers to keep you glued on their device.

User Experience is called, I call it addiction.. and a nasty one.

5.  Pathetic: Losing human relations

There are no restaurants where I don’t  see pathetic couple or group of friends not talking and just glued to their phone.

That’s sad…and as said pathetic.

6. Dangerous

Text and drive anyone?

Or text and walking…(now forbidden in some countries finally!)

7.  Stupid 

We spend hours doing stupid and useless stuff on the phone, not looking for the cure of cancer.

We need to stop and right now.

How to reduce the screen time

Decide right now the screen time that is absolutely essential.

In my opinion that’s teh max you should allocate:

  • Facebook: 5 minutes
  • Twitter: 5 minutes
  • LinkedIn: 10 minutes
  • Instagram: 5 minutes
  • Personal E-mail: 10 minutes
  • Mindless Browsing: 5 Minutes
  • News Reading: 10 Minutes
  • Financial, Economy: 15 Minutes
  • Blogging (amateur…otherwise is considering job): 20 minutes
  • Others (Redditt, Pinterest etc.): 15 minutes

Total:  1h – 40m per day.

This should be your max screen time per day.

Be very clear on when you will use your screen time (e.g. Instagram only immediately after dinner or never)  and STICK to the plan.

Live back your life…right now..please…

So …You want to Retire…? From what? And… to do WHAT?

    Another Beach…?

and move to a Caribbean beach or in some countryside in Europe and maybe open your small bar, business that  (of course!) it will be very successful…bla bla bla….

Or…join the latest trend of movement of FIRE (Financial Independence. Retire Early)

SO… (did you notice how big was this so…?)

Why you didn’t retire yet?

You know…the kids, the mortgage, the family, the  <enter other excuses here>…”

Ok, let’s see why you didn’t do it yet and why you should change right now your approach on this for your mental sanity.

First and foremost…

you didn’t retire yet because you don’t really want it bad enough.

But…let’s take one additional crucial step…

Let’s go and find it….

You have to answer two questions first:

Do you want to retire from what…?

Let’s start with the first part

Retire from what?

Easy right? I am hearing you now from the screen…

You want to run away (sorry..retire)…from:

  • Your boring job
  • Your evil boss
  • A city you hate
  • Hours of commuting
  • Colleagues friendly like a bear
  • A cold and raining weather
  • Your answer

Ok, done…

Now the second part of the question…the most difficult

Retire to do what…?

I am hearing you less now….some weak and general statements like………

  • To golf more
  • To sleep more
  • To spend more time with my family
  • To relax
  • To read…write…
  • To play an instrument
  • Your answer

So…if the reasons above  are so strong to make you consider to quit your job and changing radically your life…why don’t you dedicate more time to them while you work…?

If playing golf is such a burning desire…why you are not more efficient with your time (e.g cutting internet/social media/TV time) to satisfy that burning desire?

Same for the rest…

If you are not spending time to do the things you think you like it’s only because there is not a burning desire behind them.

Instead you decided to waste your life watching a screen instead of living it

You just want to retire from something to…become lazy!

Wasting time in front a screen is your burning desire…

Let me repeat….

Wasting time in front a screen is your (only) burning desire…

Because you do it day in-day out for hours and hours and you are never bored doing that…

Indeed with the advent of the smart phones and tablets we are not bored anymore because we have anyhow always something to do…watching our phone!

Help me…!  What should I do  then?

Assess yourself
Shut down all the distractions and ask yourself what you really like
The goal here is to really understand your passion once you remove the screen time…(use phone app or other tools to track it)
You used to like golf, swimming, playing guitar, bla bla before the screens came in the picture… right?

Reignite again your passion
Start practice again what you use to love.
Set a schedule calendar for it and do it
Enroll in some tournament, competition, to set a measurable goal and a target.
It would be strange in the beginning but you will rediscover the desire…

Act on the big dream
Leaving in Europe opening a small business was your dream and 9-5 escape ?
Start planning it.
Plan a trip THIS YEAR, discover how to buy/rent a place over there…if that’s the place you really like…start thinking about the business.
You decided to invest your time reading this blog instead of watching TV or mindlessly browsing your phone…so you are committed to change, clever, energetic.
You can do it…no doubt about it…start now

That’s it.
Few points and actions.
We make it complicated but it’s not.
We just lost sight of what we are and what we love
Understand that the world out there wants every second of our attention to MONETIZE it…

Don’t fall in the trap, you are more clever than who wants to suck your money and life

Setting your goals (Oh no…there I go again!!!)

What about if I am telling you that setting goals is TOTALLY USELESS?

Yes…you read right…

Wait a second!

Everybody is shouting  to set your goals bla bla bla (not everyone actually..)

..and what about your spiral ????

Remember…?

Did you make the exercise?
Did you realize that you are exactly today what you really want to become (even if you don’t like it?)

Good

Here I  will explain you why setting goals is a total waste of time…and how to design your life better

Let’s start…

Why setting goals is useless

If you are like many people December 31 is setting goals day.

or better…

forget about the 90% of the goals not achieved the year just past and making another list of goals very likely identical to the one of the previous year or of the previous 5-10 years

One typical list might look like

1) Losing weight
2) Eat more vegetables
3) Exercising more
4) Walk more
5) Complain less
6) Change job
7) Cleaning more often the house
8) Making more money
9) Call more often your mother
10) Write a book
11) Start a blog
12) Learn how to play an instrument
13) etc etc

If you are an advanced goal setter you list can even look like this one:

1) Losing weigh: drop to XXXlb or YY Kg by end of the year
2) Eat vegetables at least 3 times a week
3) Exercising more: run/bike/swim at least 3 times a week for more than one hour
4) Walk XXXXX steps everyday
5) Stop complain
6) Change job by May 15 and move to a higher pay/job title one
7) Cleaning the whole house 2 times a week
8) Making XXXXX$ per year
9) Call your mother 3 times a week
10) Write a book about cooking by May 31
11) Start a blog by Jan 31
12) Learn how to play guitar good enough to play 1h a day every day
13) etc etc

Look at your goal list now…

If you are reading a blog on personal improvement like this one I am sure you have one

Are the same goals over and over in the list year after year?

You might also tried to break the yearly goal in monthly goal or weekly goal…maybe using the thousand of books and manual written out there that should have shown you the infallible method to reach your goals.

Maybe now you feel stupid or uncapable and every December 31 sadly you set the same goal being sure that this time will be the one you will achieve them! (and stopping following up on your goal on January 2!)

Don’t worry we all go throught that,,,you are not alone

The reason why you don’t reach what you call goals that you write on the list is that you don’t really…desperately…badly want them and you don’t feel the urgency to reach them.

Let me repeat it:

The reason why you don’t reach what you call goals that you write on the list is that you don’t really…desperately…badly want them and you don’t feel the urgency to reach them.

Period

Think about the things you wanted and achieved in life vs the one you think you want but not achieved yet.

What are the main differences?

The actions you took.

Plain, simple but so difficult to grasp.

Let’s go deeper

Why you achieved those things…? What’s so special with them?

Very likely because of social conditioning.

You got a diploma or a degree or a driver license because the society is pushing you to do so…there are schools for that  right?

Very likely you do some sport not to have a too devastated body.

What else?

What about the goal to play decent piano, golf, guitar?
To start that blog?

Not done yet right…? No time…you are too busy right?

What about the dream to create something for yourself? To be a small entrepreneur?

Nothing right?

is it more easy to stay in the cushy corporate world where your boss is telling you what to do, right?

Now you know the answers…maybe you can watch a funny but profound Ted talk on why we don’t reach our goals and…why we achieve something… (watch it…short and worth it!)

The bad news?

Everything is up to you
there is no blog, no book, no seminar that will make you take the first action

The action is in your head.

You can decide Right now if take the action or do something else, go back to work or browsing the web just to waste you time

Waste  your life or create  something spectacular…

It’s totally up to you…

One simple secret to decide your future

The society wants to make you believe you are not mortal.

Why?

To  keep you spending, consuming and avoid the big questions:

What’s my real purpose in life?
What I really want to be and have?

Billions of people wasted their life without having achieved anything they wanted.

Numbly they let other people designed their future, because they never know  what they wanted  for their future.

I will teach you a small but powerful secret to decide your future, to get back in control of your life.

 

Firstly: What do you want?

You need to know what you want and how to reach it….you need a compass and you governing the ship of your life.

That’s what you need

 

 

Without  compass and drive you are like a boat without anyone governing it…a boat that is going where the waves and currents (that very often are your family or bosses or society) are bringing it….eventually crashing against some rocks.

You don’t want to end up like that

You need a roadmap to be in the driver seat of your life even thought is more easy to seat in the passenger’s one and let someone else driving.

 

But driving your life like that

How to draw a roadmap?

I took this idea from a great book called The Pathfinder

Take a A4 piece of paper…design a spiral on it.

The starting point of the spiral is when you were born then when you went to school…5 years…ten years…the university…then when you start working..write what you did until today…and put a mark and label it NOW.

Your life

The ending point of the spiral is the day you will die (sorry for the bad news you will as well)….put an age….70…90…100..be realistic …write DEATH on it
Now write from the mark NOW to the mark DEATH what you expect to do in your life…write it into the details…visualize the targets…where you want to be…with whom…doing what…

Stop whatever you are doing and come back when this exercise is over…it has to take at least 30 minutes….it’s important…very likely the most important exercise of your life

Did you figure it out now…?

Finished?
Interesting…isn’t ?

Do you have still time? Very likely yes…

Or maybe not

How do you know?
What the spiral is telling you?
Is it a straight line with no changes or excitement to the grave?
A 9-5 until 65y, a gold watch as retirement gift, getting old, slow and then sick and die?
Or there is something exciting inside…a new job, place to live, kids, learning something, moving to some beaches in Ecuador or Europe and sipping cocktails until Ms. Death arrive (you can have your last cocktail with her actually).

What’s this roadmap telling you ?

I am telling you my secret.

When I first made this exercise several years ago I thought “whatever, let’s waste 30 min (actually i think i spent less than 10 minutes) of my life on this”, I completed and forgot it in some notebook.

One day, many years later (12-13 I guess) the same notebook ended up in my hands.

To my surprise most of the things I planned/envision really happened!

Not all of them but most.
Never sub estimate the power of visualization

You become what you think about, all day long

As Earl Nightingale used to say in the amazing The Strangest Secret

For better or for worst.

We become what we plan in our mind, and to me this happened also well before the Spiral exercise.

I was very clear not only on what i wanted but on ehat i will become of me
i had no doubts of what i will become that to me it was perfectly normal to picture me in my actual life
everything happened effortless, without any need of driving it

That’s why fake goals simply do not work.

Writing a Running a marathon goal on your 20XX list will never be accomplished if you are not really convinced of running a marathon is what you really want… but it’s on your list just because you think it must be there

Be the architect of your life

Your life from birth to death is already programmed and designed in your brain and the architect is you and only you.

Let me repeat:

Your life from birth to death is already programmed and designed in your brain and the architect is you and only you.

You can do anything you set your mind to, man (ok…this one I stole from Eminem… 🙂 )